is it okay to pursue adoption w this perspective

I love being a mother. But I have a cocktail of mental illnesses that I simply cannot disrupt with pregnancy. I cannot afford to get off my meds to have another child. I want to welcome a new child to my family. I don't care if they're a baby or not but I would love to welcome a child that my child could be at least 3 years in common. I would love an open adoption but would respect the privacy of birth parents and families if they were not comfortable. I didn't form a natural connection to my child bc of mental illness but I'm an amazing parent now. I just don't think blood is the determining factor and idk I know there are many ways to be insensitive as a pre-adoptive parent and I'm not trying to have a skewed perspective. I know my family hasn't finished growing yet but I don't believe it's meant to grow through pregnancy if that makes sense. I would love kind, supportive, and neutral to healthily honest commentary. I'm not trying to get torn apart like I see many folks on here getting treated. We come here to learn not get eviscerated so please be kind. For context I worked with an adoption agency as a prospective birth mother until I felt it wasnt right for me with my kiddo. That's why an open adoption would be so important to me. Thoughts anyone? Idk