AIO - I want to leave my open relationship because I feel like a Cuck

I thought my wife and I were turning over a new lead today, she even brought me cinnamon roles, one of my favorite treats. I just can't do it anymore after today though. I am tired of feeling like a cuck and don't think I am mentally or physically built to be polyamorous.

I am tired of seeing my wife workout and focus on her appearance for men who are not me. I am tired of seeing her go on several dates and sometimes bring random guys home or staying out all night with no texts or calls. I am tired of her developing connections that seem stronger and more physically intimate with men who are not me. I am tired of striking out again and again when I try to pick up or develop relationships with other women. I feel like creep whenever I tell them I am in an open relationship and it has led to many awkward social interactions.

This has all culminated with a very emotionally and painful experience, where my wife has started sleeping with her coworker (lets call him Brad) who is an arrogant prick, and who mocks and teases me to my face. There are a variety of reasons not to like him, think of your typical enlightened centrist Rogan/Musk alpha techbro. This is the polar opposite of my beliefs and what I thought my wife's were, although we have been drifting apart lately it feels like. Sleeping with random guys is one thing, her sleeping with a guy I actively dislike and who has such incongruent values with our own is extremely hard to cope with.

I suspected they were sleeping together recently but my suspicions were finally confirmed yesterday evening, when my wife tells me she was having a visitor over. I was watching tv in my living room last night and to my surprise and disappointment see Brad walks in. As he entered the room he gives me a smirk and said "whats up bud" and then embraces my wife, I see her look at him like she has not looked at me in years (if ever), and my heart just sank. I retreated to my office and tried to distract myself with youtube/netflix and my new TIE Fighter Lego set. Around 9 pm I hear, moaning and sex noises. I put on my noise cancelling headphones and play music while feeling utterly defeated. About 45 minutes later I feel vibrations and take off headphones and to my disgust I hear loud thumping and sex noises, I also hear my wife scream out "Brad you are so fucking huge". At this point I roll out the cot in my office and put the headphones back on put on a podcast and turn the volume up . I take them off around 11 hoping I can get some sleep. It's silent finally and I eventually am able to pass out. But around 12:30 I am woken up to more loud thumping, moaning and sex noises which seems to go on forever. It was the worst night of my life.

I don't think I can keep up the charade anymore. I need to tell my wife that I can't live like this anymore and that we need better boundaries or a serious change to our lifestyle. I am absolutely petrified of losing her though and afraid I am throwing away all of the good times we have had up onto this point.