What if I hurt them?

Whenever I'm 24M drawn to someone as a companion, I tend to get serious about things. I worry about the what-ifs: what if we get close and I hurt her later? What if I become distant or find her boring? These thoughts often lead me to back off.

I enjoy having conversations, but I get attached quickly, and the overthinking begins. In my past relationships, I never initiated intimate conversations, preferring to wait for the other person to feel comfortable discussing it cuz I don't want to be the one who ruins anything with such moves.

I struggle to understand casual dating, worrying that even small details might hurt the other person and ruin their expectations. This overthinking has made me feel like a weirdo.

Sometimes, I think it's my defense mechanism to avoid getting hurt. However, I realize I can live independently, but the fear of hurting someone else persists. And it's obvious accountability is important, right? How can I change my perspective?