how to move past feeling envious of my psychiatrist?

hi all! thanks in advance for the advice! I (32F) am really struggling recently with comparing myself to my psychiatrist. I’ve been seeing my doctor (also my therapist) for two years now and he is amazing - he’s extremely kind and non-judgmental, and makes me feel comfortable and safe. I found him at a time when I was experiencing a mental health crisis and he helped guide me through a hospitalization, new diagnoses and med changes, and outpatient programs. he’s also helping me heal my severely damaged relationship with men and learn to trust them. I’m currently still on disability leave and my doc is helping me come out of the really tough time I’ve been having over the past few years. I’m extremely grateful to have in my life.

the stupid problem I’m having is that I can’t get past comparing myself to him. He’s honestly a perfect man - funny, kind, handsome, successful; the kind of person I’d like to be and the kind of man I would like to be with. I used to be successful but burnt out in my career due to my mental health and have been struggling to get back on track. I’ve also been single for a long time and have been watching all my friends get married and start to have children and even though I have wonderful friends and family it’s just been making me feel so alone.

my doctor recently told me he and his wife were expecting a baby and he’ll be going on paternity leave soon and I’m ashamed to say I was so upset I was beside myself. I didn’t know he had a wife and now he was having a baby and I was immediately overcome with feelings of envy, shame, and inadequacy. I am so happy for him but I hate to say now it’s all I can think about. I’m unsure whether I want to have children but constantly feel time pressure. I don’t have a partner so am also missing the other part of the equation I need for that anyway.

I feel so ashamed to admit but my doctor’s news basically hit me in the face with exactly what I want in life at a time when I’m feeling most vulnerable about never being able to get it, and now I don’t know if I can move past it and keep working with him. I can’t stop thinking about how he has everything I want during our sessions. I really want to keep working with him and really don’t want to go through the ordeal of finding a new therapist when i have such a good one, but I’m worried I can’t move past this.

many apologies for the long post but just wondering what you guys think?