Sayo: Things you can learn from her character/story, and how she helped me grow as a person

Hello, everyone. I've been a long-time supporter of Sayo since the beginning, and vocal about my opinions of her on this subreddit. Some of you may even recognise me from random paragraphs in comment sections in which I prattle about various Sayo related topics, or posting pictures on /r/ChurchOfSayo. You may have noted that I often talk about various lessons that people can learn from Sayo, or virtues that she represents, though I don't usually tend to go into too much detail since each comment would end up being very large indeed. Well, I stand by my words and have decided to try (keyword here) and make a summary of what I believe to be positive qualities that she displays, as well as some of the lessons that can be learned from her. These could be her own personal traits, or situations and events that she overcame throughout her story that highlight an important lesson, many of which I feel are valuable to the players and worth adopting or thinking about. As I noted in the title, some of these things have been invaluable to me personally. I recently graduated from university, and I do believe that Sayo helped me learn things that changed how I think and ultimately assisted me in growing and overcoming challenges I faced over the last 1.5 years. I'm not trying to claim that these are all deeply insightful, and your mileage will almost certainly vary based on a number of factors, but it may be of use to think about them and reflect on some of them. This isn't the most smooth of write-ups, it can be hard to put things with so many conditionals in such a way that it reads nicely, but it is what it is. In any case, let's jump right in.

Traits/Qualities

Like all characters, Sayo displays various traits or qualities that contribute to who she is as a person and often dictate how she acts. These can change over the course of time, both in what kinds of traits she expresses, as well as the intensity with which each trait is expressed. It goes without saying that not all traits are necessarily advantageous in every circumstance, but each may have significant importance when used in moderation, or in tandem with other traits. In some cases, the value of a trait is highlighted by its absence, which may have negative impacts on Sayo.

Determination

Probably the one on the tip of everyone's tongue when Sayo comes to mind, and also alluded to by the song 'Determination Symphony' being the event song for the Umbrella For the Autumn Rain event. Sayo displays incredible levels of determination when it comes to achieving what she wants. She seeks to be the best guitarist, and a frighteningly large number of her decisions seem focussed on this, especially early on. She cuts no corners and gives everything she has for anything related to that goal. From turning up 30 minutes early to practice(1), to considering what kind of tech she can get to improve the sound of the performance(2), to practicing even more at home until everything is perfect, all the while keeping her academic grades high and participating in other activities. Such a trait is incredibly valuable for everyone. If you want the best chance of getting what you desire, you have to want it and be ready to work for it, and the ability to act on that urge will be a boon to you. For me personally, I also find her determination to be intrinsically inspiring, which in turn has pushed me to work harder. Looking deeper, Sayo also shows us the ugly side of determination, when it is left unchecked and turns almost into an obsession. Having a goal and being willing to do anything to work towards it may be admirable, but it is important to remember to moderate yourself and not damage or destroy yourself in the process. Work hard, but take care of yourself.

Perseverance/Resilience

Initially, this may seem quite similar to determination, but the focus of perseverance in this case is slightly different. While being able to work hard and with determination is useful, you will encounter situations or circumstances that are taxing and will make you want to quit. Take Sayo, for example. For almost her entire life, she has been made to feel inadequate and inferior by her sister(3). Every hobby or interest she chose, Hina would adopt and overshadow her, so Sayo would quit and find something else. Despite the seemingly hopeless situation and constantly having to put up with those negative emotions, she eventually decided to make her stand with the guitar and not be beaten. Initially, this was out of desperation, but as she grows throughout the story this desire becomes a lot more healthy. Her ability to then persevere with that chosen course despite the emotional trauma it caused her, especially after learning of Hina's intentions, is indicative of her resilience. Trying to catch up to someone that has been out of your reach for your whole life is no small task, but I'd say she really peaks when she elects to continue playing the guitar for Hina's sake as well, to try and continue rebuilding their relationship, in spite of all the pain it causes her. Back in reality, the world today is on the cusp of great change, and resilience will become a highly valuable trait to possess by allowing people to deal with the stresses of the world. As before, seeing Sayo endure so much and keep going helped me put my own struggles into perspective and ultimately overcome some of them, and is something that I can draw strength from for future problems.

Logical and Pragmatic

One of the more dominant aspects of Sayo's character, particularly early on, is that she largely relies on logical thinking when dealing with a wide variety of situations. Whether or not this is because she holds back her emotions as a result of her trauma is another question, and ultimately up for debate. Her rational mind can be a powerful tool, allowing her to find problems quite quickly in many situations, and come up with solutions. It lets her come up with good plans for accomplishing objectives, such as in academic or musical pursuits like revision, practice, or live-show planning and general organisation. This remains an incredibly useful skill in real life as well. Being able to take an objective look at a situation and work your way through it logically can help you come to the most efficient conclusion. Though it often helps you come to the 'best' solution in a technical sense, the tendency to avoid emotional input can sometimes leave the outcome wanting, but this is something I will mention later. As someone who has long used logic primarily to solve problems, it was pleasant to see a character that utilised logic over emotion, and she does reinforce the idea that logical approaches do have their place, though not always. One such example, which made her somewhat unpopular at the start of the game, is how she leaves her original band - this was done using total logic to identify the error, that being a lack of practice, and no concern was given to the feelings of the other members. Sayo very quickly realised they were not compatible, and elected to leave the group.

Self-Esteem

One of the saddest aspects of Sayo's character is that the trauma of being made to feel inferior for so long seems to have left her with almost no self-esteem when it comes to things she isn't already invested in. She doesn't believe she can play any other instrument than the guitar, she thinks that the Roselia band members compliment her cookies just to avoid hurting her feelings(4,5), she even believes her very presence can cause it to rain and ruin everyone's fun, and that's she's not fun to be around in general. Her lack of self-esteem really demonstrates how important it is to love and believe in yourself, and avoid that malignant self-doubt that twists your own mind against you. When you can preserve your self-esteem, you won't miss out on opportunities because you don't feel like you can do it, or that your presence is a chore to others. In Sayo's case, she missed out on playing the taiko drums, she very nearly missed out on the festival, and almost threw her confidence further down the drain in the belief that Lisa and the others were lying to her. Thankfully, other characters have helped her along the road, but things could have been much worse if nobody stepped in. It's something that can be quite hard to see if you're stuck in a rut, but seeing her doubt herself so much made me realise how often I do it to myself and, in turn, has allowed me to try and distance myself from that way of thinking. Where I once second-guessed myself at every hand's turn, I can now give myself the confidence and believe in what I'm doing. This greater confidence can help you to succeed more easily, which in turn reinforces that way of thinking.

Open-Minded

At the start of the story, it appears that Sayo is very much set in her ways. She does things as she always has, has no time for silliness, and is generally not too receptive to things that may initially appear to contrast with her ideals. One of her core issues when it comes to making music is that she's always strived to practice hard in order to reach a level of skill that can be measured objectively, and so she struggles to understand how to move on from there. However, a lot of that is a facade and often Sayo is simply afraid of showing her true feelings on the matter, preferring the protection of not being too attached to others. She is, in fact, quite an open-minded person and has been shown to be receptive to ideas from several individuals, such as the player, Lisa, Yukina, Tsugumi, and more, particularly when it's related to her being able to grow and be a better person. Hina is a very good example of Sayo trying to be open-minded, as their story revolves around trying to understand one another better. It goes without saying that being receptive to another person's point of view is a very useful skill. If you're receptive to something then you can understand it better, and this can go a long way in helping to settle disputes and arguments. It's also essential to grow as a person, by embracing new ideas that might challenge what you originally thought instead of rejecting them out of fear or arrogance. I, myself, have fallen into the trap of believing I know more than I do many times, so I can attest to the fact that being open-minded to new ideas is incredibly important, and seeing Sayo receptive to various things even when they cause her pain compels me to remain open-minded.

Honesty

Sayo is brutally honest a lot of the time when it comes to other people. She won't shy away from calling something atrocious if she feels it was, and indeed has no fear of being blunt. That is, until it comes to talking about herself. When it comes to emotions, Sayo instead tends to fake disinterest, or deny that she's feeling positive emotions over something. I won't go into the psychology of her emotions, but it does seem like she has them sort of the wrong way around. Being honest with others is important, but the way in which you deliver what you say is also crucial. Sayo is honest, which is good, but doesn't mince her words, which can sometimes be detrimental. On the other hand, it's so important to be honest with yourself. It allows you to see what you truly want and allows you to be more confident in yourself and what you're aiming for, and lets you access the passion you need to reach for those goals. It also lets you be more honest with others as well, and not having to lie to others will be a massive weight off your shoulders, especially if you're doing so to maintain a certain image. This makes you true to who you are, and once you adjust you will likely feel much better about yourself.

Lessons to Learn

Aside from traits, aspects taken directly from Sayo's character, there are also several lessons within Sayo's storyline itself, less so related to her character and more to do with the various events and circumstances she finds herself in. Often these are pivotal moments of growth for Sayo herself, whether that come through self-reflection, or via the interactions with other characters.

Love Yourself

Sayo has experienced more than her fair share of negativity so far, and it shows early in the game. She hated the fact that Hina made her feel terrible about herself, hated that Hina surpassed her every time she tried something new (6). But deep down, she knows that Hina isn't to blame. The thing she hates most is herself, for blaming Hina when she knows it's not her fault, for reacting terribly whenever Hina is around and treating her so poorly a lot of the time. Honestly, it's heartbreaking to see her question whether she's a terrible person for acting the way she does (7,8), even though she's clearly traumatised and not to blame (this story is one of the only times that Sayo cries about something). She really highlights just how important it is to be kind to yourself and not beat yourself up over things, especially if they've already been and gone, because you can do yourself a lot of psychological damage. Loving yourself means that you can recognise your positive and negative traits, and work to improve yourself, instead of getting caught in a cycle of self-hate. It helps you become more confident and relaxed, since you're not always tense about what mistakes you're making, or beating yourself up over things that are no longer important. For Sayo in particular, her lack of self-esteem and confidence largely stemmed from the fact that she didn't love herself. That is slowly changing, as she comes to terms with her situation with Hina.

It's ok to fail

Something that should have come across quite clearly is that Sayo is desperate to succeed (9), building to an almost frantic state towards the end of Autumn in the Umbrella Rain. Not only in the guitar, but her desire to be the best also bleeds into other activities, such as her academic work, where getting 2nd place in a class test was still unacceptable to her. This is undoubtedly very relatable to many people, like me, who feel the pressure of succeeding (academically or otherwise) in order to remain relevant in an ever-more competitive job market, or due to the pressures of family. While it's certainly commendable to think this way, and it does have its place, it is vital for people to understand that you don't have to be able to succeed at everything first time, and you don't have to be the very best at something to have value. That's not to say that you shouldn't aim for the top, by all means do, but just keep in mind that it's not the end of the world if you don't quite make it. Sayo herself has struggled greatly in her quest to understand Hina better and be more honest with her, and nearly failed completely during the Umbrella For the Autumn Rain event. But, she was able to eventually accept that it was going to take some time to build herself up. There is no shame in having to try multiple times, everyone works at a different pace for different things.

Balance Logic with Emotion, don't focus on just one

Often people tend to view logic and emotion as two sides to a situation, and frequently will favour one or the other when it comes to problem-solving. As someone that tries to repress their emotions early in the story, or is afraid of facing them, Sayo very much comes across as someone that relies strongly on logic as I mentioned earlier. But, as she grows through the story we do get to see her act more in touch with her emotions and accept that they are important too. Her interactions with Hina slowly show more warmth, and she displays a greater insight into emotions when working things out during Neo Aspect (10). This is certainly reflective of the real world, and you will find people for whom logic doesn't cut it. Our emotions are part of what makes us human and are intrinsically a part of the decisions people make and opinions that people hold. It is of great value to be able to act with both emotion and logic, and decide which one to use when and how to balance them, and it will let you reach a greater range of people with whatever you're doing, whether that's an argument or in a job.

Self-Reflection

One of the best things that Sayo can be seen doing is that she never tries to cover things up and say that they'll be alright. Instead, she is very much a personal-power kind of individual and believes in facing a problem head-on, reflecting about things in order to come to an answer (11, 12, 13). This kind of reflection can be seen frequently in her card stories, where she ponders her emotions, limits, and how she can best achieve her goals (14). A great example of this can also be seen in the Neo Aspect event. Instead of trying to comfort Yukina, or give her empty words that everything will be fine, Sayo gives Yukina's own advice back to her, that people have to move forward on their own, which prompts Yukina to reflect on everything that's happened and come to her true answer. And it's true, things aren't guaranteed to be alright in life, it's up to you to do everything you can to make it so. Reflection helps you get clarity on who you are and what your goals are, and also allows you to come up with the best way of achieving those goals by taking a look at where you are now, the good and bad choices you've made, and how you can move forward from there. It's important, however, not to dwell on the bad things. Address them, accept them, and move on.

Not everything needs to be serious

One of Sayo's longest-running issues, and one which she has received multiple pieces of advice about, is that of her nature to take everything very seriously and give everything her all (15). This goes from practicing and playing guitar, to cooking and even when playing video games. Lisa has been seen telling Sayo to relax and unfurrow her brow, and Tsugumi also highlighted that there are some things for which you can't always have a serious and regimented approach (16), and that it's sometimes better to take things easy. While it's true that taking things seriously is likely to ensure higher quality performance, doing so all the time will simply wear you down and burn you out. It can also mean that you might miss out on some of the fun and enjoyment that can be had by just relaxing and taking things easy. Sayo herself is a great example of how taking things seriously all the time can make you stiff and highly-strung, which is no fun for anyone and can prove to be an unhealthy mindset when it gets out of hand. Knowing when to take things seriously and when you can relax is crucial to prevent yourself from burning out, and instead lets you unwind after work and then return to it later in good spirits.

It's ok to rely on others

I think most people would agree with me when I say that Sayo was very much a lone-wolf character at the start of the franchise (17). She was harsh and often cold, but dedicated and hard working. While such traits can be admirable, they aren't conducive to friendly interaction most of the time (though she does get a few friendly moments). Overall, she gave off a vibe of someone that preferred to go it alone, playing in Roselia just to try and beat Hina, not for the band itself. What's so great is that her story shows a very marked change in attitude towards assistance from others over time. She opens up to Lisa a great deal with regards to Hina and that whole situation (18), and continues to rely on Lisa for issues where Sayo doesn't have a lot of confidence, such as when she asks for help in wanting to help Rinko (19). I think this is something that's really understated in the world today. Guys in particular often feel this pressure that they have to deal with things themselves (though it can happen to anyone) because it 'wouldn't be manly' to ask for help. I think that, as Sayo demonstrates, it can be invaluable to talk to someone you trust about your problems, or let them take some of the weight if they offer to. You don't have to do everything by yourself. Not only do you forge a deeper bond with the person that helps you, but it takes some of the weight off your shoulders and will help keep you from wearing yourself out. It can also be helpful in general to see things from another person's perspective, and that alone may help you in solving the problem.

Don't be afraid to change

The final lesson I want to bring up incorporates a little bit of some other parts I've discussed already, and involves taking a look at one of the main overarching themes of Sayo's story. 'Change' is a key aspect to Sayo's character; she wants to improve her relationship with her sister, and wants to be a better friend to her band members, and sometimes tries to force herself to try new things or experiences (such as cooking and attending the drum festival). Sayo undergoes quite a substantial change in her outlook on a variety of issues over the course of her story. The desire to rekindle her relationship with Hina seems to work like a catalyst to induce further changes in her, making her more open to others, less uptight, and more comfortable with herself (20). While I wouldn't say she feared to change herself, I think that looking at how she is happier and healthier later in the story paints a good picture of how it can be beneficial to change and that it shouldn't always be feared. I think sometimes, particularly for young people, it can be hard to see who you really are and we sometimes cling to what we're familiar with because it's safe, we dislike change because of the uncertainty. I think Sayo demonstrates quite well that it's ok to not be perfect or correct all the time, and that you shouldn't fear trying to change yourself to improve who you are.

Closing Remarks

First off, if you made it this far then congratulations and thank you for entertaining this somewhat long-winded rambling about Sayo. There are probably a few mistakes in there that I've missed, so please forgive me. I think what I'm ultimately trying to show is that Sayo not only shows good traits, like her determination and resilience, but also has clear weaknesses like her tendency to take things too seriously, and her trouble with emotional honesty and loving herself. I think that both these sides are endearing and can teach people many great lessons, or highlight valuable ways of thinking. I'm not saying that everyone should go out and adopt all these things straight away, but if you're someone that feels they aren't valuable, or believe that logic prevails over all, perhaps there may be some value in looking closely at Sayo's character and story. You might find that you can relate to her quite a bit, and seeing her struggle to overcome those similar situations might help you reflect on yourself and find the path to making yourself a stronger person, as I have. The road to self-improvement is long and hard, and there is no better model of that in Bandori than Sayo, so to watch her grow is itself an inspiration. As always, I'm deeply looking forward to more stories and content for her and I hope that you've enjoyed or found value in some of the things I've written here. Thanks for reading!

If you feel you've gained something from Sayo or any other characters, please feel free to comment about it!