Does anyone else cry silently or surpress crying completly?

So i was reminded of this last night, i was distraught and exhausted from work and then recieved some news that a friend had died suddenly. I don't know where my head is really at homestly.

But i've always had this need to surpress crying, cry silently or hide.

Then i remember having to do this as a child and also he told if i didn't stop crying then i'd be given something to cry about and i was always scared.

Sometimes i forget how much damage our parents do and i was reminded of this yesterday. I guess i'm looking to for some solidarity here that i'm not alone.