I suck at this

Being old (25) sucks. The kids made me look like grandpa on the jumps Im so rigid not how I used to be. I'm slowly building up confidence but jesus some of the gaps were massive in person, its very intimidating. Settled on this small ridge and tried it a few times. Felt like I was going to OTB every time 1st time nearly bucked me off. Not the best spot to land as it went straight down into a bend and then stream. But I'm slowly getting there. Online makes it look so easy!