What happens when you give up?

I was diagnosed with sleep apnea last June or July and put on a Resmed Airsense 11. After trying a number of masks, the one I tolerated best was the f20 AirTouch. By late fall I let my Dr know that was still exhausted, didn't feel better, etc, so he had me do another sleep lab, and they found I was more combined apnea that the first study had shown.

Beginning of the year I was switched to Airsense 10 ST, and it was really rough. The machine was set so that both inhalations and exhales were at a much faster rate than felt normal. Worked with the NP, she adjusted "16/12 to 15/11 cmH2O and decrease the backup rate from 12 to 10 breaths per minute" - this helped some but still not great, so the NP had the provider make smaller adjustments (nothing to the Rx, more about comfort level).

Again, it was better, but it's still a face-hugger latched to my face all night, and I'm burning out on it. I'm 55m, and I got this far through life without it - my husband would just tell me I'd snore a lot in my sleep (as does he at times), and that I had weird breathing like I'd stop breathing or hold my breath.

Again, I'm tired of the machine, the mask, the cleanings, the replacement parts, the fear/guilt of what will happen with the insurance company if I skip one too many nights in a certain period, and definitely being forced to breathe in a way that doesn't feel natural to me.

I've even tried being the person who encourages other to get through the rough beginning.

So what do the rest of you do when you hit this wall? What happens if I tell my NP that I'd like to discontinue this? She works with my neurologist at the Cleveland Clinic (NE Ohio, USA), and I love him - he's helped me get through the weirdness of finding out I have MGUS, and dealing with mild peripheral neuropathy. I got used to the neuropathy for the most part (plus medication helps). Will they look down on me for quitting the mask? Will "dropping out" of this after being treated affect anything in the future as far as insurance/medical claims go ("well he knew he needed treatment, but declined, so now this apnea-related thing that's happened to him doesn't get coverage"?)

Seriously - I don't want to try sleeping with the mask anymore. And no, it's not a matter of switching to nasal pillows or the other options. I've got a pile of mask formats I didn't like...

I even got into the nerdiness of the Oscar data, and sharing it here (from the prior Airsense 11), and had thought about doing the same now - but that's not gonna to fix all the issues. And I'm not so sure my scores are all that great now... (MyAir screenshot for last week: https://photos.app.goo.gl/LkC9ACoMMLTsqysM8 ) So I've got that "why bother" attitude.

Thanks for letting me vent, whine, whatever...