My sister is disabled and my family is just pretending she isn’t.

I’m so incredibly frustrated right now. My sister is 31 and can’t read or write. During school, she was put in the special needs class but was failing as she found school incredibly difficult. Her school gave her a special needs diploma. My parents didnt know English so they just assumed she was a bad student. She has tried college- got scammed by a fake college and got into loads of debt. She was denied by multiple colleges because she didn’t get a high school diploma. My sister kept telling me that she needed help getting her GED so I told her that I would help her. That’s when I realized she couldn’t even read.

Most of my life, my mom and dad kept telling me that she is stupid because she didn’t want to study. When I tried teaching her, she would get all the letters mixed up and couldn’t read an entire line without accidentally skipping to another. She has gotten fired from several jobs because she reads the total wrong or can’t give correct change. I told her that she needed to get tested but my mother told me there was nothing wrong with her and to stop belittling my sister.

She has gotten into so much trouble because of this. My sister has signed so many contracts without understanding anything and in massive amounts of debt. She never got her drivers license because she couldn’t pass the written test and has incurred multiple fines all dating back since highschool. Her husband steals money from her and will buy whatever he wants while the bills unpaid. Despite her husband cheating on her with her other mentally disabled best friend- she doesn’t have the funds to divorce him.

For years I have been trying to help by helping her create budgets. Calling creditors to try to get the stuff off her record. Reading legal documents to see if she was getting sued. Organize her taxes. Because my mom would tell me that I had gone to college and could teach her anything. So I have tried so hard but nothing helps.

Ever since my mom died, my sister hasn’t been able to keep the lights on some months. My older brother will loan her money but my other sister tells me she is done with helping her because she doesn’t want any money to go to the awful husband. My dad has been even worse to her since I have bought my first house. He keeps saying she is a failure for not being able to buy one before me and belittles her.

I called her today and she told me that she was laid off from her job for two weeks because she left without notice (she went to the hospital). She reapplied but was now late on car payments, insurance, phone bills, etc. she has told me that my older brother gave her a $65 loan for food last week but now has no more food for this week. My sister was so embarrassed telling me and I immediately sent her money to help out.

I see her trying so much but l know it’s not her fault. My family keeps looking at her like a disappointment.

None of this includes her extensive amount of medical stuff that’s happened- multiple miscarriages, cancer, foot surgery, GI issues.

I want to help her but where do I even start? I’m sorry for all the spelling errors. I haven’t slept at all and am intoxicated.