It’s tragic and sobering that scientists still haven’t found the cure for ass hair
I’m young, hopeful, and college-educated. I have friends and family that love me. From the outside, my life looks peachy. But I carry a horrible burden.
I have a truly heinous amount of ass hair. Just… shocking amounts of thick, dark hair growth. In the crack, on the cheeks, I think there’s even some fuzz on my taint. In the dead of night, I battle it alone, but shaving only staves it off for so long. It seems as if 90% of my body’s energy goes towards maintaining the Stygian garden that calls my ass home.
What recourse do I have? Nair? Never, unless I wanted to irreparably fry my hole. Waxing? Then I’d have to bear my greatest shame in the face of some poor unsuspecting beautician.
If only there were some pill, some medication I could take to tame the jungle way below. But our broken healthcare system will never cater to the needs of myself and the many other disenfranchised, hairy-assed women suffering in silence. Sometimes, it’s all I can do not to give up all hope.