Does anyone else fear the afterlife more than anything? And have you been able to get past it?

I don't really believe in any 1 particular God. I was raised Christian and looked into it more myself as an adult but I just don't buy it. I've gotten into paganism, Hinduism even dabbled into Islam, but the one thing that really gets me throughout all of it, is the fact that all of these religions were created by man. And by their own lore, if one exists, then the others can't. And I've never been able to make sense of that. The idea that I have to choose 1, and hope it's the right one, and if I choose the wrong one, I'll be punished in hell or something like that.

Now I've always been interested in all of this stuff, since I was a teen, mostly because I've thought about opting out ever since I was in middle school. I won't get too much into it, but I've had 1 very serious attempt that was very close, a few years ago. It was something I thought about doing every day and when I was 22, I finally did. Before that moment, the biggest reason I never went for it was my fear of what's next, if anything. Some people will tell you they had strong regret afterwards and were thankful to still be around, but not me. I was angry I didn't succeed. At that point, it took me a long time to get over that fear and do what I needed to do, and after the attempt, its like I was back to square one in that regard.

Anyways, ever since then, I've kept on, but I've still wanted to opt out because of, let's say, an incurable condition. And the world is moving ever more hostile towards people with my condition and I really just want to be at peace. I still fear the unknown of what comes after more than anything, so I'm asking for any advice on how to deal with that fear. Or even any way to try to have some kind of experience