I have a weird relationship with my friend. How should I navigate?

Hi all, I've been lurking on this subreddit for a while but now I want to post. I think I may also post on r/vent . It's going to be really long but please help me.

I'm 20F in my third year of university. I have this friend (O) who I met in my first year. She was honestly great, and I considered her to be one of my closest friends in university. We do a lot together and have a bunch of similar interests. In fact, when I'm on campus (and there's no class), I hang out with her. We have a LOT in common and usually I have no problem talking with her.

However, there are some times when she gets mean. I am not perfect; I have my faults. I can also be a little insensitive (I'm working on that) but when people tell me that I'm hurting their feelings I immediately stop and apologize. I make sure to try my best to not do it again.

Back in first year, O and another friend told me that I was too 'strict' and 'judgemental' and she felt that when she talked to me it was like talking to her mother. I felt really bad because that was not my intentions and so I really tried to change. When I said something that could be misconstrued, I would apologize and rephrase it to get what I meant. I made sure to constantly assure her, ask if she was ok etc. But she never reciprocated. In that initial convo where she told me I was judgemental, O also asked me what her flaw was and I told her that I feel like when people are trying to let her know how she hurt them, she immediately gets defensive and shuts down or leaves.

There was one time I joined a dating app (1st year) and O sent me a snap where she was with a group of boys and they were making fun of my pictures and prompts. I was so embarrassed and deleted my account. There was another time when we were doing hair together and she mispronounced a French word and I corrected her. She insisted that was how her teacher taught her but it was still wrong. She was so angry that she just left our client's hair leaving me to finish it by myself. She used to do hair in my dorm room and brought this boy (who I specifically did not want because he went through my things and made fun of me) when I told her I didn't want to see him. That same boy would constantly say things like 'You wear wigs bc O wear them but it looks better on her' like my friend has a monopoly on wigs. Or, 'O is better than you at hair, she's prettier, she has a better body she's lighter (I have no issue with my complexion but to praise my friend he would compare us and bring me down). Worst of all, she would just laugh. When I tried to confide in her that I felt hurt by his words, she told me that she couldn't change that (true but she was so dismissive)

O also always got more male attention than I did. I didn't care because she is very beautiful, like the black beauty standard. But when I got some small attention she would get really mad. One example from my second year is when I was waiting for her to finish her dance practice and one of the dancers complimented my leg muscles (rlly weird but I was working hard on my quads). O overheard him, came to my side and said that she was the reason why I wanted to work out because she 1) worked out first and 2) has a bigger bum so I'm obviously trying to get like her.

We have a lot of mutuals. One of our mutuals (S) is a close friend of both me and O and our roommate. O would often leave ey out of convos with S or when I was talking to S, O would interrupt me by asking my S an unrelated question. It sometimes felt like O was trying to purposefully ignore me and get others to do so (but S never did).

In my third year (currently) she has not changed but wants me to change. Two weeks ago, I was doing my roommate's (N) hair and she came in (we live together). I made a joke and asked her if she was ok. O looked at me and said 'You keep asking me if I'm ok, stop that. It's irritating me. I was really hurt because she had told me that she felt like I wasn't looking out for her. So I told her I would stop and we left it at that. I made up my mind to not speak to her unless she spoke to me first which was rarely. Funnily enough, unless I initiated the convo, she rarely spoke to me. We then went out to eat and our other roommate (K) was chatting. O didn't even acknowledge my presence, so I reciprocated. O didn't even speak to me or K until S got there and she became the most vibrant person there.

O got high one weekend and called me but was freaking out. I sent her an Uber because I was so worried about her safety. When she got back, S was taking care of her but then O looked at me and said ' You're so judgmental'. I felt really bad because I tried my best to change. Last week, we had a convo about this. She told me again that she felt that I was judging her. So I asked her what I specifically said/did to make her feel that way. She didn't give me an answer for a long time. Then she said that she felt that I was bragging about my summer internship. I didn't understand because I rarely spoke with her in the summer and when I did, I rarely mentioned the internship because I was stressing out about my work ethic. She also had a great job and made more than me so I didn't understand that. I asked her if there was another instance but she didn't give me an answer.

I came home for reading week on Thursday (I have no classes Friday) and I found out that she's angry with me for not offering her a ride back. This was news to me because 1) she told me that she has a midterm (online) to do and 2) she has never once offered me a ride back when her parents picked her up despite the fact that we live in the same city. Also, if she wanted a ride, she should've just asked and I probably would've said yes. But she didn't and I can't read minds.

What should I do? How should I navigate this friendship? I don't want us to fall apart but damn she's really hurting me as of late.