My response to Tilian's post.

I want to start this thing off with I don't care how you personally feel about me. I'm going to post my proof & experience, and not stick around to read the comments. I do not care what out of context screenshot from something I said ages ago (that has nothing to do with this entire situation) is posted to try and *~PrOvE i'M lYiNg~*, because nothing you have will ever prove that. This is for me.

Anyway.

I'm unsure why Tilian felt the need to make his post. You got let back into the band, and it's not my problem anymore. You felt the need to post that to allow your creepy fans to continue to harass me and to "clear your name", when in reality you posted nothing of substance that disproves anything I've ever said. But, I would like to add some details to your post of half-truths to let everyone know, and to maybe refresh your brain, too. :)

I've also attached a link to my GoogleDrive with plenty of screenshots of conversations from my group chat that you all seem to love so much, as well as screenshots of our text messages that contradict numerous points in Tilian's statement made today. I have a video of my voice messages from the night everything happened, while I'm venting to my friends about it. I also have a few messages I received from others that talk about Tilian's history of similar behavior from other victims, and some other names that will most likely look familiar. I won't share too much because I respect the privacy of others, but I think what I have is okay to talk about to prove myself true.

First off, you can stop with your whole painting me as some delusional, scorned fangirl narrative, it's getting pretty played out. I have enough screenshots of you blowing up my phone and acting like an obsessive fool to throw that whole thing out the window. Not to mention everything I've shared about the assault was made BEFORE you called it quits with me for that final time, as shown in the things I've shared in my Drive link.
Also your comments made talking about our night in Cleveland are pretty laughable. I am the one who offered to take you back to the bus that night, actually leaving earlier than planned because you were acting weird. I pulled over on the street right across from the parking lot where the bus was parked, literally in plain sight. I mentioned I was doing so, and you responded excitedly, "are we going to make out?". I sat on your lap and talked about you acting a little strangely that day, and if everything was alright. You said yes. I had mentioned that if you weren't feeling it, to please let me know. I made a joke saying, "If I was only character development for you in Sacramento, let me know! I can fuck off, I promise I can handle it!", and we laughed about it. I wanted to open up a bit more to discuss previous issues, but you took that the wrong way and I decided I'd save it for another time. I took you to the bus and asked if I would see you tomorrow, and you said yes. I gave you my bracelet, and you said you would talk to me tomorrow. Stop painting this scene like I was forcing you to be there against your will or something. (And honestly, if anyone here knows the Cleveland area, I think we can agree that there is absolutely NO WAY I'm about to park the 2022 SUV I'm borrowing on a random dark street behind the fucking Agora to try and pursue anything romantic for more than five minutes, lmaoo.)

I don't really feel the need to comment about much else, if I'm being honest. (Not like half these people are going to read it anyway.) The tiny, pointless details don't really matter in situations like these. I definitely could have handled the situation differently, but when you're put in a position of being with someone you've had a crush on for years and being able to help them through a difficult time- you're not going to be thinking very rationally. You're going to do everything you can to not upset them, and excuse their red flag behavior. Who wouldn't? Even in my initial post, I made it VERY clear I did not want to demonize Tilian, "cancel" him, or whatever else. I wanted to share my experience and make it very clear that all I wanted was for him to know it wasn't okay, and to let the fanbase know of my experience in hopes he would get better. There were, of course, times when I was fangirling. When I was absolutely plastered and oversharing in a private setting. Making dumb jokes, and being a human. That doesn't take away from what happened to me.
I'm not the millionaire musician saying whatever he has to to save face and brush everything under the rug to move on. I have nothing to gain from this situation, lmao. I have had nothing but turmoil in my life for months because of it. I'm still speaking on it because it is what happened to me. I even let the band know that I'm fine with having it play out in court, but I received no response. Unsure why I would let it go on this long if I had anything to hide, or if I was being dishonest about anything. I've had my most private thoughts shared all over the internet, and have seen the most vile accusations imaginable made up to discredit me. I've been doxxed, endlessly harassed, and everything in between - but I won't stop. I'm not afraid of you, the band, or any other deranged lunatic in the fanbase. Truly.

You are a sick individual, and I wish you absolutely nothing but the worst. I'd say I want you to better yourself and get the help you need, but unfortunately you're a raging narcissist who refuses to acknowledge the wrong he's done to people. You wonder why everyone leaves you, or why "99% of everyone you meet thinks you're an asshole" - maybe it's time to look within and figure out why that is. You can type out however many half-truths on Reddit that you want to, but I was there, and I know you. The rest of your fanbase has seen you (and the band) delete any and all talk about your misconduct, and exploiting Tim's death to excuse you literally raping people. You backtracked on everything you admitted to doing. You've tried suing your fans into silence about sharing their experiences with you. The same man who literally flew from his friend/bandmate's funeral straight into coercing another woman to fuck you. The same man who sat next to me in Cleveland and bragged about how many fans you've slept with, and how many have reached out to you talking about potential children you have, but "it's fine to ignore it", "because they never really look like you."
The women you've openly been in relationships with that have told me so much information about how they've landed in therapy because of you, and how much you have deceived everybody in your life that you claim to "love".
You are disgusting. I will die on this hill shouting that YOU are a rapist. You could have simply just apologized, and gotten the help you needed, but you decided to go this route.
You are a sad, insecure little man who will hurt people until the end of time because you don't know how to cope with life. Your childhood. With your own sexual trauma. Loss. Etc, etc.
You said it many times to me that you love the attention, positive or negative, and that's why you became a vocalist. But I'm so tired of giving you that attention.
Seek help, Tilian.

​

Screenshots:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tb7rEIo-MIOK2gIFOHSxSlStT-addYQPGY392HRFdiQ/edit?usp=sharing

Voice messages:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/141JG7qoiswLl55cdCyK2XDUbvaRWd7Ps/view?usp=sharing

Thanks for reading xoxo

- Mikaela