Am I in love?

I (22F) started seeing someone (26M) over the summer, so about 6 months ago. I had just graduated college and gotten out of a 3-year toxic relationship. I was messing around on dating apps, but ended up liking him way more than I was expecting to like anyone. There was a spark and a specialness that I know we both felt. At first we were excited about each other, but I started to pull away a bit because I didn't feel ready to get into another relationship. I was so conflicted because I know he is something special but I was trapped in my previous relationship and have trouble trusting. He's not the greatest communicator which I'm ok with because my ex was super anxiously attached and I prefer someone a little more avoidant. That being said, I would never hear from him reliably and it was very difficult to make plans. We ended up taking a few breaks and soon it kind of devolved into a stale routine of just hooking up. He eventually ended it, saying he doesn't want to keep hooking up with someone without romance. We parted ways but he texted me only a few weeks later saying he didn't mean it. I went over to his place and we ended up only hooking up again, so I lost trust in him wanting anything more than sex. I never texted him again. It's been about a month and I am sick. I haven't stopped thinking about him for a day. When I hear songs he showed me my stomach flips. When I see pictures of him I start shaking. I saw one last night and couldn't sleep until 3am and am now dry heaving in the bathroom at work on my lunch break. I get this fear I am letting something super special go that I may never find again. He's like nobody I've ever met and it feels like somebody hand-picked him just for me. I've had many previous serious relationships and never felt this deeply for them. I didn't even grieve my extensive 3-year relationship this deeply. What do I do? Is this love or am I just ruminating on it because of the lack of closure? Is it worth going back to him and asking to start over?