My parents kicked me out at the age of 4

When I was a child, I was quite stubborn and strong headed or at least that is what I was told. When I was 4 maybe 5 I remember my mom telling that she adopted me and I was left on a park bench and that is where she got me. She told me if I don’t behave that she will take me back and leave me there. Couple of days later. I remember my parents putting me and my older brother in the car and driving off.

We went to the park, I was told I was a bad listener. My father got out of the car and took me by the hand and left me on a pile of sand and gravel at the parking lot. It was dark, no one was there. Mom asked me if I’m gonna be a better listener. I must have said no. They got in the car and drove off. All I remember after that is the sense of fear and screaming while chasing after the car. They stopped maybe 50 ft later and asked again. This time I said yes I will listen better.

I lived in fear for the next 5 or 6 years that this could happen again as they would threaten me with kicking me out every time I acted out. The worst of it is that my older brother started making me do his chores or he would ask mom to return to the park because I’d be a bad brother. Mom knew he did this , she endorsed it.

36 years later I have a son, second born who is strong willed and can be challenging sometimes. But I never thought I would do such thing to him. I cannot believe that some parents would do this to a child.

Mom is dead. Dad lives 5 minutes away and no contact since 2009. Non of my siblings speak to each other as we were always pinned against each other and we are all emotionally damaged.

Just wanted to get this off my chest