i feel so lonely

i started my junior year in august thinking everything was going to be better than my sophomore year. got a new style clothes shoes etc. this year is worse than last year. last year i made friends with this one girl who id sit with at lunch because we had the same lunch on even and odd days we were basically the same. new school year i only have odd days lunch with her so i sit with her and then she has a group of friends and now she barely talks to me or doesn’t at all at lunch. now when she sees me in the hall she rarely says anything so i act like i don’t see her. i have less friends than last year in my class. im 17 and never experienced none of that high school group hanging out outside of school or anything. i feel like im going to die soon also. i feel so left out whenever im with them but i dont want to sit alone. i just wonder what would happen if i ended it all and who would care or say anything i basically have no friends. i have a best friend who goes to another school. i feel like im running out of time since ill be 18 next year. i have never had a boyfriend just talking stages. my dad recently passed away so when i come home its just me and my mom and i have been having so much anxiety lately. i feel so ugly because i cant get outside a talking stage or rarely someone tries to talk to me. i just wanna go so bad. i feel as people are joking my appearance in school or just in general they are. i barely have any friends and i feel ugly because of that. so i just wanna die so bad sometimes because i have nobody to talk to most of the time and i feel so unattractive and hate my body. i compare myself to other girls also. i just feel depressed i rarely have anyone to talk to and it’s just me and my mom my father passed in september so now it’s lonely.