I can’t seem to make friends that aren’t always trying to compete in some way

I know this sounds probably kind of whiney or whatever, but as a 34F, I am aware of myself and my surroundings and the people who are around me. I kind of consider myself the duff (designated ugly fat friend) with people I try to be friends with. Like, if we are both into, let’s say, a cosplay convention. I decide to go as one thing and it’s really cool and most of the costume I have to make because I can afford doing that rather than buying a super fancy costume. However, my “friends” always seem to have to go above and beyond and go overboard with fancy costumes and in a lot of ways they don’t even like it as much as I do. I know, I know, it sounds kind of silly saying it out loud, but it just seems like people have to constantly out do me. Like they have to always dress up MORE when we go out, they have to look better always, they have to do more and always I’m stuck in the shadow of them so much so that I stay away from anyone anymore because I hate feeling like the ugly person in the background. Like even when they are MARRIED and have kids, and I’m the single woman, if I find someone attractive somewhere, they will always flirt with that person and honestly my friends are way better looking than I am so again, I get pushed to the back burner. I guess it will be easier to just stay without friends than to feel like I’m second fiddle to everyone all the time.