I done fucked up and might've disabled myself (TW description of deep cuts)

So I may or may not have been trying to hit an artery last night, something which I would never admit to nor confirm doing (and for the record I am not a danger to myself or others please don't grippysock me) and I went REALLY deep. Laffy taffy. Um I guess in my haze I thought one of the tendons in my arm was... what I was looking for. There's a very noticeable knick in it I can see from the open wound. I can see when it moves. every time I rotate my wrist or move my pinky or ring finger, white hot agony. I have it closed with steri strips and bandaged with tight bandages to hopefully keep everything in it's place but it started bleeding again and holy fuck does it hurt. gotta be at work in 2 hours. is there... idk anything more I can do? other than going to the hospital which I won't do cause they freak me the fuck out. it was just wrapped in toilet paper overnight.