Possibly an unpopular opinion, but can we stop creating a hierarchy of sexual assault?

TW: SA details. A couple months ago, I was assaulted by a friend. I was in a really bad place mentally and asked them over for support and I told them we could do some cuddling (I’m in an open relationship) but I wanted underwear to stay on. They tried to take my underwear off more than once even after I had initially told them I didn’t want to do that and then stopped them the first time. My memory of the incident is blurry, but I remember at one point I was on my hands and knees, and they started rubbing my genitals with a toy without asking if it was OK. I couldn’t see what they were doing and didn’t know what it was so I assumed they were rubbing their penis on me and getting ready to rape me. I froze terrified about what was about to happen. Luckily, they realized and stopped. Yes I am grateful it wasn’t a completed rape. But it was still really traumatic. I told my partner about it and they called it “moderate” sexual assault. That was so invalidating and enraging. This is not the goddamn oppression Olympics. It is not helpful to try to decide whose trauma is worse. I already have issues with minimizing my own trauma because I compare myself to other people who have it worse and my partner knew that and they still called it moderate. Can we just stop? Sexual violence is always traumatizing. Full stop. Let’s validate and support each other instead of trying to win the game of “who had it worse?”