Genuinely hate how infrequently i develope crushes on others

I HATE IT SO MUCH WHY CANT I JUST GET ONE LIKE EVERY MONTH BUT NOOOOO IT HAS TO BE ONLY MAYBE ONCE A YEAR! AND THATS IF IM LUCKY I JUST WANT TO HAVE A PARTNER I STG GENUINELY DESPISE BEING SINGLE I ALWAYS FEEL SO LONELY AND TOUCH STARVED BECAUSE SURE I HAVE PLATONIC FRIENDS TO HANG OUT WITH BUT ITS NOT THE SAME!!!! I NEED SOMEONE I CAN HOLD, SOMEONE I CAN SMOOCH YKNOW?!?! GAWD I MISS BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP IT WAS SO NICE! ARREEGHHH I HATE BEING TOUCH STARVED!!!! Anyways thanks for reading my rant ig